The Big Picture

Little by little I am ticking away at all the responsibilities I have. If I try to do a million things (or even ten things) at once, I feel like I am drowning, so I just take it slowly and get it done slowly, but I eventually get most of it done. Something about my psyche doesn't want me to take on and achieve huge things. I can succeed at small things or big things stretched out over time, but I would usually rather quit than dive into a huge challenge wondering if I will make it out with my ego in tact.

Maybe that is why I am a big picture girl. I remember one time when I was a teen ager. I was telling my younger sister about all the plans I had for my future. They were very grand and she said I would never do all those things because I was not ambitious and didn't follow through. Part of me thought she was right. But, years later after ups and downs and round and rounds in my life path, I realized that amid all the days and years, I had actually accomplished everything that I had said I would.

Why do I take indirect, less splashy routes? I don't know. Is it less efficient? I don't know. But, I have come to accept and live by a couple of cliches: slow and steady wins the race, and I yam what I yam. It is good to live in the present but I have to be careful not to be impatient or narrow focused. Hope, faith, big picture - whatever I call it, I have to keep believing that my life is an amazing story with a solid plot line, amazing details and a good morale.

Thanksgiving

Well, I am sorry that I have not been making entries! It seems the more I have going on and the more I could be filled with writing inspiration, the less time I have to write. Today is Thanksgiving. We had a lovely day and I have a lot to be thankful for. We had dinner at our house with my sister and her husband, and my Japanese exchange student friend. There was a ton of food, drink, lively conversation, and just plain relaxation. We watched a little of the Macy's parade and went for a walk. I think our foreign friend enjoyed the traditional foods and our zany family.

I wore my brown skirt with a cream silk top. The day went by fast but we will have a clean house and leftovers for a while.

Peace on Earth and welcome winter!

Monday With My Cat

I did not want to get out of bed this morning. I had to fight against all those ideas of just quitting. The best one is where I tell myself that quitting is actually an act of rebellion, that no one can force me to do anything and I can make my own choices and I choose to stay in bed - ha! Yeah, that's a good one. It is, of course, born of sleepy, laziness and is just a clever ploy erupting from some deep-seated fear of completion that needs to be psychoanalyzed.

Anyway, the grown-up in me is winning out. I am writing in my blog. I am going to study for my Japanese quiz tomorrow. I am going to go grocery shopping for the food I need to make Thanksgiving dinner. I am going to wear one of my 4 skirts.

I look at my cat lying next to me, curled up in a tight knot. She only needs the comfort of knowing I am there to rest peacefully. She is like a dog in the way she follows me around. She caught and ate a small bird last week and then threw it up in our hallway! It was worse than most horror movies. I made my husband clean it up. It is not the grossness of the barf, but the sadness of that poor dead bird that really bothers me. What can I do though? It is natural for animals to hunt.

Speaking of animals, I waited in line for an hour with my daughter on Friday so we could get good seats at New Moon. I did not think the movie was as good as the first one but I must say that we are both on Team Jacob. I wish they would have focused on and developed the wolf story more. I will never wait in line like that again but actually the time goes by fast when you accept that that amount of time is going to be spent there and you are just in the moment.

After Thanksgiving, I plan to get motivated in my Shecological business. It has been hard lately with everything else I have to take care of with school and family. But, hopefully the holidays will be a good time for sales and I will need to keep refilling my store. I am excited to do some of the new styles I have been dreaming up.

Bye for now kitty. I'm off to class.

Skirts on Friday con't.

I really do think that my skirts project is helping me be less consumeristic. I think it is also helping me be more focused. I feel my inner vision being directed more narrowly, clearly, deeply and less frenetically. I think it is helping me with the stress and volume of things in my life right now. It is also having a positive effect on the way I am viewing my creativity and my business.

With my bags, I want to do more with less. It sounds a little cliche but that is my feeling in a nutshell. I have great hopes for the results when they finally materialize.

With my personal fashion, it doesn't even seem strange to me anymore to be wearing the same skirts every day. I make sure that my outfits are comfortable, warm (or cool if I am going down to the desert), coordinated and interesting. I pay more attention to my accessories and have fun with those sometimes. I am wearing tall knee socks or leggings every day so I don't have to shave my legs or polish my toes.

I have stopped wearing my Michelle skirt because it doesn't keep me warm enough and it is basically white. So now I have 3 skirts and I am afraid they are getting worn out. The brown hemp Mary Jane skirt and the flowered Zara are definitely the two favorites.

I don't know if I will be able to stick to these 4 for the whole year. I may have to switch in a new one for the white one. I hope the other one's don't get thread bare because I am not sure I can be dedicated enough to patch or wear holes!

In the picture at the top, I am wearing my Mary Jane skirt, a sweater that I got last year on clearance at Banana Republic, and a necklace from Polarity on etsy. She has great things and is a super nice person with a very entertaining blog.

Textile Tuesdays : #8 Wednesday Rock and Roll

Textiles can show up all over the place, in unexpected moments - even on a wednesday, in any place from ancient artifacts to modern technology and music.

Last week I went with my Japanese friend to the Museum of Northern Arizona. I wanted to show her a little bit of the art and culture we have here. I think she liked it. It is hard to know if she was just being polite. Anyway, I showed her my favorite sections - the textiles. There are ancient baskets, sandals woven from yucca, bags knitted from human hair, made with bone needles. There are also more modern works such as Navajo blankets and articles of traditional clothing.

Back at home, I was on ETSY with my daughters and we went to the Virtual Lab to see a live chat with the Australian singer - Lenka. She is one of my new favorites. her lyrics are very poetic and clever. The music is fun with a slightly dark edge. Her videos are very creative with an artsy, handmade quality, and she is cute and stylish. It got me thinking of all sorts of fun, wild art projects like decorating the house in January to look like a giant garden with vines hanging from the lamps and ceilings. It made me want to be more daring in my own work and my own style. I love that kind of thing. I love courage in personal expression. It makes me think that the human race is vibrant and moving forward into exciting futures.

Isn't that after all what rock and roll is about - at least partly? It got me thinking of the influence that R&R has had on social change and cultural trends. Think of Elvis, the Beatles, The Supremes, The Sex Pistols, Madonna, Nirvana, on and on and on. I'm not saying that any one of these people or groups is responsible for a fashion and cultural wave, but they helped bring it to the youth and the masses. One of my favorite designers is Vivienne Westwood. I saw a fabulous, exciting exhibit of her works in San Francisco a few years ago. She was the punk rock designer (sounds like a contradiction but it's not).

Part of being a rock star is having a look. Usually, that look means some identifiable fashion. A lot of stars have designers that they work with and some even develop their own lines - like Gwen Stefani and her Harajuku Lovers. Sometimes, the fashion is anti-fashion like the Grunge movement, made famous by Nirvana and other Northwest Bands.

Nowadays, there seem to be many trends that anyone can follow (or not). But rather than mimicking one person or exact look, it would be nice if everyone got the subtler message of making a statement by being oneself; having the courage to look within and express ones creativity and personality. Maybe it is impossible to be truly original, but it is fun to try. Having access to alternative clothing and accessories, being able to make your own, to play around with fabrics and other materials, is certainly a start.

The photos are from Malam and I Heart Fink on ETSY.

Life in a Southwestern Mountain Town #5

Somehow, with all the small town nothing going on, we still manage to fill our days. Some of it is tedious, and some is sweet and wonderful. This weekend, I really felt like a mother/artist/housewife in a small southwestern mountain town. Maybe I am just being "meta" as my friend Lisa would say, but I felt a little like I was watching my life, like a movie, and it was kind of entertaining.

I have connected with a Japanese exchange student at the university. We are supposed to help each other with language and cultural understanding. Mostly, so far, I have been speaking English with her and trying to get to know her. I took her to the local museum on Tuesday. I think she liked it. Saturday, my younger daughter and I took her to our little historic downtown to go shopping. It snowed a little bit and was quite cold, but we stayed inside mostly. There were a lot of people out shopping and we ran into a few different friends. We even got free cobbler from the mayor who was trying to get people to sign a petition! I tried to point out different historic buildings and tell her about how this town operates. I think she had a good time. I hope so.

I spent a good deal of my week-end cleaning a house that has been neglected or barely cleaned by me for a while. The girls helped some and it felt good to get everything organized and presentable again. I even took another trip to the goodwill.

Today a friend came over and looked through my bags. She bought a bag for herself and one for a friend for her birthday. I was flattered and grateful for her vote of confidence.

I didn't get to do any sewing and no Japanese homework. Instead, I helped my older daughter do a photo shoot for her jewelry that she sells on ETSY. She wants to give her shop a makeover so we got her glammed up and did some dramatic photos. I think she got some good ones. Unfortunately it got dark and cold before we could get the full use of the hair and make-up.

My husband is on his way home from Edinburgh and should be here within the hour. I missed him and will be glad when he is home. Sometimes I worry and just feel better when everyone is together safe and sound.

Friday Review

Another week has drifted by like an exhale. I don't seem to be able to get done everything that I want to but I feel a strange sense of calm and optimism.

(no, I'm not on mood stablizing drugs, unless you count fish oil).

I have actually ended a fairly crappy week feeling inspired and with a plan. I haven't decided anything definitely, but I think I am going to not sign up for Japanese 102 next semester. I was really stressed about my inability to perform in that class. I didn't like that some of the students were nasty to me (bitchy girl, you know who you are). But, mostly, I just want to be able to digest the material so I can actually use it. I don't care about meeting some curriculum goal or getting a good grade. I feel that if I keep covering new material, I will loose what I have already tackled. So, my plan is to do self-study for the rest of the year, go over 101 and venture into 102 on my own or maybe with a tutor. Then, next Spring, if I still want to, I can take 102 with a good solid foundation.

On the Shecological front, I have decided to focus back onto my original designs and my original plan to make natural more chic. I have been feeling really creative and want to get to the sewing and listing. The past year, I have made some fun and cool bags and I have played with lots of ideas, but I have gone off track from my true fashion aesthetic. I am proud of the work I have done and am excited to see the result of my self-redirect.

I love being able to sell my work on ETSY and I think it is a fabulous venue. But sometimes I get overwhelmed and frustrated trying to figure it out, trying to keep up with the ins and outs. Thankfully, one of the main reasons I love it is the people I have come to know through convos, treasuries, teams, etc. I really mean it. Last week, there were a few (or more than a few) days when I was about to cry, when I didn't want to get out of bed, and I got a convo from someone or a comment on my blog or treasury telling me something that was encouraging, supportive or just kind. I got notes saying that they could relate to my feelings, ideas or situation. Sometimes it was just a mutual interest or mutual appreciation for something. All these little things make me happy. They make me realize that people are what it is all about. They make me remember that I want to do what I can to make other people smile.

There are many, many wonderful people that I have crossed "virtual" paths with but this week I want to just say a special thanks to 4 people:

Rikkianne from Chakrapennywhistle

Cricket from Cricketapollo and Just 3 Things

Iris from Brownbunnybyiris

Alice from Runalicerun and Pipinghotpapers

You all reached through the blogosphere and gave me the pat on the back that I needed. So here is a big virtual hug and smile back at you.

I also wanted to talk about my skirts, about the birds in our yard, about the Japanese exchange student that I am befriending, about Lenka!, and about party planning. For now, I am done and want to go watch a DVD of Foyle's War. I will write more tomorrow.

The photo is one of my first bags from a couple of years ago.